Note to Mr. Right

Dear Mr. Right,

If you're out there, I'd like to tell you some things.

I'm difficult.  I'm finicky.  I'm particular.  I sometimes put my friends first.  I sometimes put my job first.  I like to go out.  Staying in too much is a true kryptonite.  I need alone time.  I need to be challenged.  I need to be put in my place sometimes.  I like to push buttons just to see what your reaction will be.  I'm not great at managing my time.  I don't sleep enough.  Your mom will probably dislike me.  I rarely avoid intelligent political/religious discussions.  I don't share well.  I'm not very romantic.

I like kids' cereal.  I like frat boy movies as much as romantic comedies.  I love scary movies but never at home.  I stress over things like household decorations.  I enjoy Times Square.  I love parties.  I drink milk every day.  I shed.  I can't go to bed if the house is cluttery.  I shave my legs every day without fail.  I save all receipts.  I prefer public transportation to cars any day of the week.  I get car-sick if I'm not driving.  I live for spontaneous trips.  I get a manicure/pedicure every 1-2 weeks.  I have too many handbags.  I sometimes ramble and give too many unnecessary details.

I have more love to give than I know what to do with.  I'm open to new possibilities.  I'll bake your favorite treat anytime you want.  I'll spare no expense to make your birthday wonderful.  I'll wear your favorite dress until it falls apart (or goes out of style).  I'll send you texts for no reason but never obnoxiously.  I'll take the opportunity to write while you watch March Madness.  I'll listen to your career woes without offering too much advice.

If you're out there, know that I am too.  Keep an eye out for me and I'll try to do the same.  If you're out there, I may need to be told it's you.  Or I may even ask like Elise McKenna.  Even if I sense it, I may not believe it.  If you do come along, be patient with me.  Remember that this is all new for me.  And that I may not trust my own thoughts and feelings.

If you exist, Mr. Right, if I've already met you, if I've already spent time with you, or if you are somewhere in my near or distant future, know that we're gonna have a good time...